5 Self-Care Ideas to Cope with Toddler Battle Fatigue

I get it now. Now that I’m a mom, I get it.

I used to wonder why moms did or didn’t do things the way they did or didn’t. Like the mom who showed up at the grocery store with her hair frazzled in a million different directions. Or the mom that often came to church with bed-head kids, looking like they were wearing the clothes they slept in.

Before getting married and having my own kid, I used to look at these moms and think, “Oh my God! At least brush your hair! For heaven’s sake, brush their hair!”

Oh silly, single, childless me.

I wish I could show you a recent time-lapse video of me chasing my toddler. The entire circus act started when I wanted to brush her hair before heading out for the day.  I chased her, then sat her in a chair. Then she jumped down and ran. I chased her again and sat her in a chair. She jumped down and ran away . . . again. I just wanted to put her hair back to keep it out of the fountain of snot running from her nose. There was a practical purpose to doing her hair. Nothing glamourous. Nothing Instagram-worthy. Just practicality that ended up taking all morning.

Only truth here. Hard mom truth.

Truth like . . . my soon to be two-year-old also hates to get dressed–like, every morning. When I finally pick out a really cute outfit for her to wear, it turns into a battle of the wills.

Who knew a sock battle with a toddler could turn into a 10-minute ordeal? I sure didn’t.

“I do it!” She yells as she rips the sock from my hand.

“Ok. You do it.” I willingly oblige. This is a teachable moment, right?

Ten minutes later I take the sock for the final time, “How about I help you?”

Operation Meltdown.

Literally, she’s melting into the floor. Limb by limb.

No time now for mama to do her own hair. So off to the grocery store I go with bedhead and the shirt I slept in. Karma.

Toddler battle fatigue. It’s real, ya’ll.

When I think of self-care, I wonder when and how is it even possible? I’m new at this, but I am learning that it is possible. But it only works when I’m deliberate and intentional.

 5 Things I’m Doing To Work Self-Care Into My Life:

1. Putting self-care dates into my shared calendar with my husband. Examples: Dance Fit one night a week, girls’ night once a month, arranging date nights.
2. Scheduling daddy to take baby to daycare early 1-2 days a week in order to get in some reading, exercise, or alone time before heading into work.
3. Buying spa day Groupons for a pedicure or manicure and putting it on our shared calendar.
4. Planning an overnight get away every other month and arranging babysitting with family ahead of time.
5. Carving out time in the evenings to prep for the next day. I’m working on this one because I never do this. Like never. But it really does make sense. So the desire is there. I just need the motivation!

Part of self-care is making good choices for yourself and your family. Being deliberate requires some motivation, and being intentional requires some accountability. Having a shared calendar helps let my husband know what I need and when I need it. He in turn helps hold me to it.

Not only do these five action plans help me look forward to the time I can get away to recharge, but they also make me look forward to reconnecting with my kid and husband once I’ve had some time alone.

What kind of things do you do to take care of yourself? I would love to hear back from you! Please comment below and share with the rest of us moms!

Originally published April 2019.

The opinions expressed in this post are those of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of ABQ Mom, its executive team, other contributors to the site, its sponsors or partners, or any organizations the aforementioned might be affiliated with.