Have you ever been stuck in a “mom rut” that you just can’t seem to shake?
Our summer break started off on the wrong foot with nasty coughs, cancelled plans, two cranky kids, and one tired mama. Add in some PMS for me, my son’s first two-year molar, and my daughter getting too sick to attend VBS. Yep. All three of us were absolute monsters by the end of that two-week stretch. Although things have leveled out significantly since then, that little rough patch really took its toll on me. I was deep in a mom rut for weeks.
There have been plenty of times when I have felt like I’m just barely scraping by. The feelings are amplified by all the pretty Instagram accounts and perfect mommy bloggers that I like to torture myself with on a daily basis. Yes, I see your beautifully arranged home with the modern decor and the bright white paint and the happy vibes. I see your adorable children, dressed to perfection, posing in front of that super cute mural in some artsy part of town. As I squint at your pretty pictures through my tired, swollen eyes, from the depths of my dark, dusty, toy-scattered, mis-matched cave of a living room, I might even feel a little sorry for myself.
The thing is, I think that it’s normal, and even OK, to feel this way sometimes.
My kids are one of my greatest joys, but they also exhaust me. They make me laugh. They make me cry. I want to dance with, sing to, smile at, hug them. They make me want to throw things and run away screaming. And for every one of those pretty Instagram-worthy moments we have, we also have about twenty-five not-so-pretty, real-life moments.
I had an especially hard day last week that left me at my wit’s end. My two-year-old spent the better part of the day getting himself into trouble. My four-year-old was egging him on, adding to my frustration. I try not to raise my voice with my kids very often, but I think I spent half the day screaming, eventually ending up in tears. At the end of the day, I sat down with my daughter and apologized to her for the way I had reacted. She looked at me, confused, and truly couldn’t understand why I was trying to apologize. In her eyes, I hadn’t done anything wrong.
It made me realize that the good days make up for the bad days.
My kids know that I love them, and they see me working my hardest to give them a good life. Thankfully, they are quick to forgive the occasional slip-up.
It’s good to know that the next time I have a day when I just “can’t even,” my kids will be just fine with cereal, frozen waffles, and too much PBS Kids. And let’s face it: The only one bothered by this scenario will be me. It makes no difference to my kids, just as long as they feel love. Thankfully, we’ve no shortage of that around these parts!
Next time you’re in a mom rut, just remember to love your family and keep on swimming (and maybe try one, or several, of these simple mood boosters!) As the saying goes, You Can Do Hard Things. And those kiddos? They don’t see your mom rut. They see a mama they love, and who loves them back.
