The Last Baby: Savoring Every Moment

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My last baby turned one and I am pretty much a wreck about it.

The Last Baby, Savoring Every Moment from Albuquerque Moms BlogFor as long as I can remember I have known
that I wanted to be a mom.  When I got pregnant with my first son I pinned all the nursery pins, registered for all
the baby things, and bought all the cute clothes. I dreamed of who my baby would be and of the siblings that I hoped would (and eventually did) follow.  I waited excitedly for baby flutters in my tummy, for the first smiles, the first laugh, and the first steps.

The first year came and went just like any other but then something happened.  Time did not stop.  Instead, just as all the sweet old ladies warned me, it flew by.  Now, five years and three boys later I just celebrated the last first birthday for my very last baby.

The last baby.

My husband and I decided long ago that three was our limit so It’s not like I didn’t know this day was coming.  The funny things is, as much as I was prepared for the first baby, I was equally unprepared for feeling all the feels of having a last baby.  My whole life I looked forward to having children and now, six short years later, that chapter has closed.

And you know what?  It’s sad.  I’m sad.  It’s not the kind of sad that makes me want another baby, but it seems as though it is not unreasonable to grieve a little.

I actually did try to listen to those sweet old ladies and savor all of the moments of the last first year.  The things that seemed so painfully hard with the first baby were – dare I say – easy with the last baby. Well maybe not easy but easier at the very least.

From the moment my last little baby was born I saw the sleepless nights as a gift and not a burden because they came with extra snuggles and baby smells–the good kind.  (They also gave me a great excuse to drink all the coffee all the time).  Nursing became a privilege and not a chore, and I wasn’t in such a rush for him to reach all of those first year milestones.  If you can believe it, I was actually quite sad when he started sleeping through the night!  Did you hear that?  I said I was sad to be getting more sleep.  As I said before, I’ve been a total wreck. But isn’t that just how it goes when we become parents?

So now my last baby is one.  And while I feel deeply saddened by the end of this sweet, sweet chapter, I am thrilled that we are still at the beginning of the book.