I Get Help Cleaning My House


Confession: I get help cleaning my house.

Once a month, someone comes to my house and cleans up after my family.

There was a time when I was embarrassed about this. I felt like paying someone else to clean was the easy way out–that I should be able to keep up with things on my own.

I don’t feel that way anymore. In fact, let me tell you why having someone else clean my house once a month is maybe one of my favorite things ever. And I wouldn’t judge you one bit if you considered doing the same thing.

As I type this, someone is scrubbing my toilet and mopping up all the pee my three year old leaves on the floor. I don’t mind telling you this because even though I might be on the computer now, this morning was spent with my boys. Since someone else was doing my chores, I moved slower at the park. I played a game with my little guy who just learned the word “boo.” I pushed the other in the swing until he almost fell asleep. Instead of making a mental list of all the things I needed to do when we got home, I simply enjoyed being with them.

You see, my husband and I see my role as homemaker as much more than just picking up and cleaning up after everyone. There is still plenty of that. Having someone clean my house once a month doesn’t mean I miss out on sweeping and mopping. I sweep under my dining room table at least three times a day, at least.

But what’s more important to us than the $100 plus we could save if I did all our cleaning? The shaping and nurturing of the three little hearts in our care. Having someone else clean my house once a month means I have more time to continue building our culture of love.

In our day and age of DIY everything, admitting to needing help isn’t vogue. But this quote from Margaret Kim Peterson, author of Keeping House: The Litany of Everyday Life, gave me some encouragement: “There is nothing wrong with hiring out the housework, or various bits and pieces of it, any more than there is anything intrinsically wrong with buying shoes or electricity rather than trying to make them yourself. At its best, hiring out some of the housework can constitute an acknowledgment that you can’t do it all yourself.”

When I sent out an email to a playgroup of fellow moms, I learned I wasn’t the only one who couldn’t keep up with it all. I was looking for a reference for a good cleaning company. As it turns out, a lot of my peers had been getting help for quite a while. It was just never something we talked about.

I realize that it is a luxury that not everyone can afford. But I don’t think there should be any reason to be embarrassed about getting help cleaning your house. Like Peterson said:

“Keeping house is a big job, and we all need help, at least on occasion.”

Originally published February 2019.

The opinions expressed in this post are those of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of ABQ Mom, its executive team, other contributors to the site, its sponsors or partners, or any organizations the aforementioned might be affiliated with.


  1. So true! I have help twice a month. Since I have had help, I am much more relaxed having people over. We have many people every month in and out of our home. It is now a joy! In fact, I told my husband I would happily give up my cell phone to be able to have help cleaning our home!

  2. We have had a little help for a very long time. When my husband and I were DINKs and worked crazy hours we decided to go in with a neighbor and hire a service that came monthly. This was awesome because we didn’t need to be there and the service gave us a discount for being able to stack our stop. We recruited another neighbor and got an even better price.

    Then we moved. Our new town wasn’t as open to having help, or so I thought. As I sat in a meeting one day one of the other people dashed in late, appologising that her housekeeper had been running late. The whole table of people chimed in that they had help too.

    When we bought our home, the previous owners gave us their house keeper’s info. This was a sort of silver bullet. Our housekeeper is a weekly part of our schedule. She knows our quirky older home and has info about how things have been done and who to call. We love Miss Sue and my children see her as a sort of extra aunt.


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