Are You Living with Anxiety? You Are Not Alone!

I am overwhelmed. There I said it. The three words that are so hard for me to utter out loud to anyone, let alone a rather large group of online moms. I am trying to juggle motherhood, my husband, my family, church responsibilities, work, and social obligations. There are times the anxiety gets to be so much that I want to just say no to everything, but playing with my daughter. She is the one happy constant that can bring me back down to earth and out of my own head.

My Purpose

Becoming a mom has the best thing that has ever happened to me. And I am eternally grateful for my daughter. However, I am struggling with my identity outside of being a mom. My sole purpose in life is to take care of her, to nurse her, to change her, to bathe her, to feed her, to teach her, and ultimately to love her. I am so consumed by this love that I often find myself sad or feeling overwhelmed at the thought of being away from her. It scares me. It shakes me to my core. And I don’t feel normal again until I’m holding her. Sometimes I even realize I can feel the sorrow of missing her while we are in the same room.

Living With Anxiety

The rational part of me knows this is a form of postpartum depression or anxiety. But the irrational part of me fears this terminology. I know it’s “normal” to have a certain amount of these feelings. But I get caught up in trying to figure out if they are the okay kind to have or not. I hate the label so much that I avoid talking about feelings to anyone, because I am afraid of showing any weakness. For more on postpartum anxiety, check out this article from another ABQ mom blogger.

(If you do think you are dealing with postpartum depression, make sure to talk to your healthcare provider.) 

Coping Mechanisms

Everyday I figure out how to deal a little better. Sometimes it feels like I am dealing worse than others, but regardless I am dealing. 

1. Pray. I talk to God everyday and ask Him for patience with me and to show me my path.
2. Say it aloud. I have challenged myself to try to say when I am having anxiety to someone close to me. I have an amazing family and support system. And sometimes I just have to make myself tell them the truth about how I am feeling.
3. Take a walk, drink water, or listen to music. Finding the methods that calm you are integral to the healing process. Check out these calming remedies from a past blog post.
   

Ugh, Feelings!

I’m not really sure what I wanted to get out of this post, other than to share it with other moms who are probably feeling the same way or have experienced something like this rush of emotions. (Check out yet another mom blogger going through the same thing!) I do hope that when you’re reading this you feel like you are not alone in these feelings and that someone else has gone through them too. It’s what makes us human, whether we like it or not.