To the Forgotten Mothers on Mother’s Day


When I was pregnant with our son, David, I had a lot of people stop and wish me congratulations on that first Mothers day. Only, what most people didn’t realize was that it wasn’t my first Mothers day – it was my fourth.

I miscarried our first two pregnancies. Even after our son was born, it took me two years to begin to be able to enjoy Mothers day without pain. I know for many, Mothers day is a time of more sorrow than joy. I can never come to this day without thinking of mothers I know for whom this is the case – and many others I don’t know. For some, their miracle has not yet happened – perhaps will never happen. And sometimes leaving the house on Mothers day can be a little too hard, because you are the one with empty arms, who doesn’t get a flower, who doesn’t get celebrated, even though you should be. I will never forget that feeling – the sorrow – of being a forgotten mother. And, so,

To the mother who is hurting today:

To the mother whose babies are not in her arms;

To the mother who has not gotten to show off her baby bump, because her baby left earth too soon;

To the mother who did show off her baby bump, but whose baby was born sleeping;

To the mother who has lost a child to SIDS, cancer, or other tragedy;

To the mother of the prodigal;

To the mother who’s still waiting;

To the mother who can’t walk down the baby aisle because it is too painful;

To the mother who doesn’t receive a flower when she walks into a restaurant, even though she should;

To all the mothers who feel sad, invisible, and forgotten –

You matter today, too. You are honored today, too. You are in my heart, now and always.

Originally published May 2019.