Google-Induced Mommy Guilt :: Reaching Out to Chatterbox Speech Therapy

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The following post is part of a sponsored partnership with Chatterbox Speech Therapy. It is important to us that we partner with local businesses we feel bring value to our readers. All of the opinions expressed are our own.

I don’t know about you, but I was blissfully unaware of the anxiety and guilt that enters your life when your first little baby enters the world. One of the blessings (or curses) is that there is a TON of information about parenting and child development available online.mom and baby-Albuquerque Moms Blog

Naturally, when I noticed my daughter was not speaking as much as some of her peers, I turned to good ol’ Google. Google confirmed my fears that my sweet darling was behind on speech development. What CRUSHED me was the statement that language development happens naturally by speaking to your child and reading to them.

I started to question my entire purpose. I had become a stay-at-home mom when my daughter was 7 months old. If the internet was suggesting I wasn’t speaking or reading to my child enough, then what was I doing with my life?

I felt as if I had utterly failed as a mother.

Maybe you have experienced this feeling as well. The guilt and feeling like we have failed our children can come from hearing the opinion of a family member, the media, comparison to others, or a seemingly innocent Google search.

I want to encourage any mama feeling this way to take a deep breath, hug that sweet babe of yours, and be proactive.

If you are worried about child development, seek out help from an actual professional. We decided to get an Early Intervention assessment and did in-home therapy for a little over a year.

Early Intervention lasts until the child is 3 years old, so when my daughter was approaching that age, our provider recommended we get an assessment with a speech therapist in order to continue services. I didn’t have the best feeling about that secondary assessment. I sought out a second opinion at Chatterbox Speech Therapy.

Chatterbox Speech Therapy was a breath of fresh air.

After talking with the speech therapists, I no longer felt the guilt that had been plaguing me for over a year. They assured me that each child develops on their own schedule. My daughter’s articulation (the way she pronounces words) was appropriate for her age considering she was a late talker. I appreciated their honesty. They took a complete look at my daughter’s speech rather than just comparing her to a standard chart.

I left that appointment feeling more confident and optimistic than I had for a while. As my daughter’s third year progressed, I began to feel that “punch in the stomach” feeling everytime she said something and an adult would reply with “Uh huh” or “What did she say?”.

Back in January, I had my daughter reassessed at Chatterbox. This time she did show a deficit in her articulation. The therapist was very understanding and empathetic to the guilt I had been feeling around my daughter’s speech. I was reassured that my daughter’s articulation was not my fault. That, in fact, Google was wrong. Speech and articulation are developed partly by hearing speech from parents.  There is also a lot of oral-motor learning that must take place. Some kids can pick this up naturally. But others need extra help and practice.

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My daughter will begin speech therapy soon to work on her articulation. I am looking forward to working in partnership with Chatterbox’s therapists.

I’m not one to dole out advice often. However, I do want to encourage any mamas out there to reach out to the amazing resources we have in Albuquerque if you are feeling that mommy-guilt around any aspect of development.

You aren’t alone. And you don’t have to rely on Google to diagnose, induce guilt, and fix your worries.

4 COMMENTS

  1. You are not alone either. I felt that way as a parent who had a background in child development. And other such things. Naturally I like being quiet. I too felt like maybe I wasn’t doing enough at home. We read to our daughter everyday, we sing, we dance, we laugh and play. She knows sign language. That has help our communication tremendously. She is 2.5 now. She is a slow talker. She has therapy. I think we all in someway do comparisons. I know I did. Still do. This is knowing that my child has her own path. Ultimately she is ok. She’s still learning and growing beautifully all in her own time. That’s something I have to acknowledge despite my education, despite research, despite the fact that I am doing enough for her development. Thanks for sharing. Posted on Fb as well.

  2. Thank you so much for sharing Erin. I was really nervous writing this post, because it is a vulnerable topic and I also still compare and feel guilt. Like you, I am constantly reminding myself that my daughter will grow into the person she is meant to be on her timeline-not mine, not anyone else’s. I’m so glad this resonated with someone else.

  3. My first child was also a very late talker. She developed speech at the age of 3.5 along side her brother who was 1.5. This was in the early 70s when there wasn’t nearly as much research available on speech development. Ultimately, she was diagnosed with an oral processing disorder similar to dyslexia. She also had other learning disabilities and was in special education classes throughout her school years. She is a fully functioning 48 year old woman who is in a long term marriage and has been employed for many years. I felt that guilt for many years until I learned that her late speech development was due to the way her brain processed oral input and I was not the cause of her late language acquisition.

  4. I love Chatterbox. I know how hard it is to share. They helped me not only with my own child’s speech but also on the road that I walk now. Part of her speech issue was that she is ASD or Autism Spectrum Disorder. Thanks for sharing.

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